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Four Myths about Divorce Mediation in Illinois

 Posted on August 24, 2021 in Divorce

IL divorce lawyerFor many couples, using mediation during their divorce saves them time, money, and stress. In traditional divorce court litigation, spouses must present their arguments to a judge and then rely on him or her to decide crucial things such as the allocation of parental responsibilities, parenting time, child support, and spousal support. In contrast, mediation allows spouses to directly negotiate the terms of their divorce agreement, resulting in an outcome that is far more likely to be mutually satisfying.

Although mediation has its advantages, it is not right for every couple. In this article, we will dispel some common myths about divorce mediation so readers can have a clearer picture of whether mediation is likely to be helpful. Keep in mind that this article is not meant to replace the valuable advice of an Illinois divorce attorney.

Divorce Mediation Myths

Mediation Is Just Like Couples’ Therapy - Although a skilled mediator will try to develop and encourage communication between spouses, he or she will not attempt to reconcile the spouses and save the marriage. The goal of mediation is to negotiate important issues about which spouses disagree. Childcare responsibilities, finances, and asset division can all be part of the mediation process, but airing personal grievances and trying to rectify them is not.

We Cannot Use Mediation if We Fight - In order for mediation to be successful, a couple does not have to get along perfectly or even well. Spouses must simply be committed to communicating, allowing the mediator to reduce tensions, and keeping conversations focused and constructive. In fact, mediation can be very helpful to couples for whom tense communication is a long-standing issue.

The Mediator Picks a Side - A mediator is an impartial third party who does not represent either spouse. One spouse cannot hire a mediator if the other spouse is not interested in mediation. Typically, both spouses will have attorneys whom they can consult outside of the mediation process, but attorneys are not part of the mediation process itself.

Spouses Have No Control of the Mediation Process - Many spouses worry that by introducing a third party, they will lose the ability to advocate for their own interests. With mediation, the opposite is actually true. Spouses drive the mediation process by negotiating the terms of their divorce decree. They have the benefit of a third party to counsel them and diffuse tension while they express their priorities and create compromises.

Speak with an Experienced DuPage County Divorce Attorney

Understanding how mediation works can help you decide whether pursuing mediation is right for you. A Naperville divorce attorney with experience in alternative dispute resolution can discuss your unique circumstances and help create a divorce plan that works for you. Contact Calabrese Associates, P.C. to set up an initial consultation with one of our compassionate, skilled divorce attorneys. Call us at 630-393-3111 today.




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