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Approaching Your Divorce With MaturityEvidence of an immature romantic relationship can be seen in how a couple breaks up with each other. To avoid the pain of the breakup, one person may avoid talking to the other or place all of the blame for the breakup on that person. As important as a marriage is, you would like to believe that a married couple would be more mature than that when getting a divorce. However, some spouses follow the same behavior patterns as immature couples that break up. The difference is that behaving poorly during a divorce can have more serious consequences. If you both behave like adults, you will increase the chance of having amicable divorce negotiations.

Avoidance

The most immature example of avoidance in a dating relationship is called “ghosting,” when one person suddenly stops communicating in hopes of ending a relationship without having to confront the other person. You cannot ghost your spouse unless you decide to run away. However, you can avoid having necessary conversations, such as:

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Preparing For Your Initial Divorce ConversationDivorce is a monumental event that will affect your life and the lives of your family and friends. However, your divorce will start as a conversation between you and your spouse, with a stark message: “I do not want to be married to you anymore.” It can be difficult to build up the courage to have that initial conversation because you anticipate the pain and turmoil that it will cause. Your initial reactions can set the tone for whether your divorce will be amicable or combative. You cannot control how your spouse will react to your request for a divorce, but you can prepare for the conversation in an attempt to minimize conflict.

Be Gentle

Leading up to the conversation, you may have accepted that your marriage is beyond repair and divorce is what will make you happy. Do not assume that your spouse has come to the same conclusion. Recognizing conflict in a marriage is different from wanting to end the marriage. If your spouse is surprised by your divorce request, he or she will likely be angry and upset. You should anticipate this response so that you can:

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