Filing for divorce is a momentous decision. Before you begin the process, it is a good idea to ensure that you are prepared in every way possible. The last thing you want is to be knee-deep in divorce proceedings and realize you are unprepared to navigate a critical question. 

Preparing For Divorce Financially

The first thing any professional will recommend is to begin saving money. It is not only attorneys that cost money—you will likely encounter many different bills, and without your spouse’s income, it may be harder to pay them. It is imperative, however, that you do not attempt to hide your assets, at least not money such as your paycheck that can be considered marital property. Illinois is an equitable distribution state, meaning that marital property is distributed to the spouses in the most equitable manner possible upon a divorce. Concealing money that is earmarked as marital property, as spouses’ paychecks usually are, can lead to accusations of hiding assets.  

It is also a good idea to consult a financial professional sooner rather than later, bringing any financial documents you have so that you can develop a realistic picture of your finances at the outset of a divorce. A professional will be able to give specialized, individualized advice as to whether you should take the step of closing joint accounts or opening a private account, or what to do with certain assets like stocks and retirement accounts. These instruments are so individual, and each situation so unique, that often, only a professional can assess your potential financial issues with any degree of accuracy.

Divorce is such a consequential decision that couples often hesitate to assure themselves that they are making the right choice. There is a financial cost to a divorce, though a couple’s biggest concern is often how the divorce will affect their children. They may also feel social pressure to not give up on their marriage prematurely. However, a bad marriage is unhealthy for the spouses and their children. So, how will you know when it is the right time to divorce? That is a conclusion you must reach by weighing the positives and negatives of your marriage. Every marriage has its good and bad aspects. There are several signs that the bad in your marriage may be outweighing the good:

1. Unsafe Environment: One of the primary benefits of staying married is having a stable home for your family. However, frequently fighting with your spouse instead creates an unhealthy environment for everyone. If the fighting becomes physical and verbal abuse, you need to remove your children from that toxic environment.
2. Loneliness: Living with someone you no longer love can make you feel as isolated as being single. Your marriage lacks the intimacy you need to feel fulfilled. You may be afraid of being alone after your divorce, but you should consider whether you already feel lonely in your marriage. By being single, you at least have a chance of finding love again.
3. Lack of Happiness: Marriage vows traditionally include the term “for better or worse.” You promise not to give up just because your marriage is going through a rough patch. However, you need to have the good moments to balance out the bad. Suffering in a marriage with no payoff is more masochism than dedication. Your own sadness also has a way of spreading to your children, affecting their moods.
4. Fear of Change: There are valid reasons to work on a marriage instead of getting a divorce. You may still love your spouse and believe there is a path to a better marriage. You may want to try your hardest to salvage your marriage for the sake of your kids. However, some spouses avoid divorce because they are afraid of the change that comes with it. If complacency is the only thing preventing your divorce, you are better off making the decision now.

Good Divorce

A divorce done right will make you happier and healthier than you were in a bad marriage. A DuPage County divorce attorney at Calabrese Associates, PC, can guide you through an amicable divorce with your spouse. To schedule a consultation, call 630-393-3111.