Posted on March 21, 2018 in Child Custody / Allocation of Parental Responsibilities

Disputes involving the allocation of parental responsibilities become more complicated when one of the parents moves to a different state. Relocating with a child from Illinois to another state requires court permission, decided by what is in the best interest of the child. If the relocation is approved, there are new questions about:

• How parenting time will be divided between the parties;
• Which state has jurisdiction when future parenting disputes arise; and
• How parenting agreements will be enforced across state lines.

Most states in the U.S., including Illinois, have adopted the Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act to set guidelines for co-parenting across state lines.

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 Posted on March 14, 2018 in Divorce

Illinois has largely removed the consideration of fault by either party from the divorce process. Because Illinois is a no-fault divorce state, a spouse may only cite irreconcilable differences when filing for divorce. Though infidelity or abuse can cause divorce, divorce courts are not concerned with them when determining whether to grant a dissolution of marriage. It is a spouse’s desire to divorce that is important, not the reason for it. However, some accusations of fault remain relevant when a court creates the terms of a divorce agreement. The court may consider illegal or immoral behavior by one spouse when deciding to compensate or protect the other spouse.

Property Division

Illinois divorce law instructs courts to equitably divide marital properties between two spouses. Equitable is different than equal because it means the courts are not required to be exactly even when dividing properties. Courts can start from equal and use their judgment to determine what would be a fair share of properties. Acts of fault that include financial impropriety are part of the court’s reasoning process. For instance, a spouse having an affair often buys gifts for his or her affair partner. A court may financially compensate the victim spouse during the division of property if the cheating spouse used marital properties to purchase the gifts.

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 Posted on March 03, 2018 in Divorce

Your paperwork can literally pile up when going through a divorce. You will need to keep track of various personal documents, court forms, bills, and official correspondences. Your documents will likely be a mix of paper and digital files, which may add to your confusion. Disorganization can cost you additional time and money as you try to find important documents or correct mistakes. Being organized comes naturally to some people. If you are not one of those people, here are five tips for improving your organizational skills:

1. Use Folders: Whether physical or digital, you should sort all of your divorce related documents for future reference. For physical documents, folders and binders should work well, along with a filing container. On your computer, you can create folders and subfolders for text documents, spreadsheets, PDFs and other files. You can also use folders in your email to sort messages. Folders will both protect your documents and make it easier to find them later.

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 Posted on February 26, 2018 in Divorce

While parents often consider the needs of their children during divorce, adult children of divorce are more likely to be overlooked. Parents will not include adult offspring in their divorce settlement unless the adult is still a legal dependent. Parents may also consider adult children more emotionally resilient and in less need of comforting. However, adult children can still feel devastated by their parents’ divorce and emotionally vulnerable. Their parents should reassure them and protect them from the ugly parts of the divorce.

Traumatic Experience

Parents may mistakenly believe that their divorce will not upset their adult children because the children are living on their own and starting their own lives. The divorce can be a shock to the adult children because they may:

• Not have seen the divorce coming;
• Rely on family stability for emotional support;
• Feel awkward about whether to pick sides; and

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 Posted on February 20, 2018 in Divorce

Going through a stressful divorce can cause you to develop insomnia. Your thoughts are dominated by worries of how you will settle your divorce and what your life will be like afterward. It can be difficult to turn those thoughts off once it is time for sleep. Even when you manage to fall asleep, your overactive mind may create nightmares that wake you up. Dealing with your divorce on top of your normal responsibilities is tiring. You need meaningful sleep each night in order to refresh yourself for the next day. You can take steps to combat insomnia, both leading up to your bedtime and when you are trying to fall asleep:

1. Regular Exercise: Find a time in your schedule when you can routinely exercise. The activity relieves tension and may expend enough energy to make you tired when it comes time to sleep. A tired body can override an active mind.
2. Decompression Time: Your mind needs a chance to settle down before you go to sleep. Create a cutoff point during the evening after which you will try not to think about or do any work related to your divorce. Find a relaxing activity that will distract your mind.

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 Posted on February 13, 2018 in Divorce

In the past couple of months, the media has increased its attention towards sexual harassment allegations brought against male celebrities. Careers – and presumably marriages – have been ruined. However, most sexual harassment cases involve people who are not famous. If you believe the claims made against your spouse, it may be enough reason for you to want a divorce. You may feel:

• Shocked that your spouse is capable of such action; and
• Hurt that your spouse is seeking the admiration of someone else.

Because Illinois is a no-fault divorce state, you cannot cite the sexual harassment as a reason for your divorce or expected to be compensated for it. However, your spouse’s involvement in a sexual harassment case can still affect your divorce.

Lawsuits and Debts

When a victim publicly accuses someone of sexual harassment, he or she often files a lawsuit against the perpetrator, seeking a monetary award. A verdict against your spouse or settlement may affect your divorce finances by:

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 Posted on February 03, 2018 in Prenuptial Agreements

Creating a prenuptial agreement is helpful in settling financial issues that will come up during a divorce. The agreement lays out a plan for how premarital properties will be treated and what level of spousal maintenance will be provided. However, spouses should consider it a living document that may need to be updated. Financial circumstances in the marriage can change in ways that make the agreement obsolete or unfair to one party. It will be easier for both parties to renegotiate the prenuptial agreement while still married than during the divorce.

Spousal Maintenance

Parties in a prenuptial agreement may choose to establish the value and duration of spousal support payments after divorce, especially when one party has a significantly greater income than the other. However, the balance of financial power can change in a marriage:

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 Posted on January 30, 2018 in Divorce

Evidence of an immature romantic relationship can be seen in how a couple breaks up with each other. To avoid the pain of the breakup, one person may avoid talking to the other or place all of the blame for the breakup on that person. As important as a marriage is, you would like to believe that a married couple would be more mature than that when getting a divorce. However, some spouses follow the same behavior patterns as immature couples that break up. The difference is that behaving poorly during a divorce can have more serious consequences. If you both behave like adults, you will increase the chance of having amicable divorce negotiations.

Avoidance

The most immature example of avoidance in a dating relationship is called “ghosting,” when one person suddenly stops communicating in hopes of ending a relationship without having to confront the other person. You cannot ghost your spouse unless you decide to run away. However, you can avoid having necessary conversations, such as:

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 Posted on January 23, 2018 in Child Custody / Allocation of Parental Responsibilities

There are some details in your marriage and divorce that your children do not need to know. Children already have a hard time adjusting to their broken family after a divorce. Telling them about their other parent’s faults that led to the divorce will hurt them more. Your most important job as a parent after your divorce to protect your children. That means shielding them from the infighting that often accompanies a divorce.

Too Much Information

Dragging your children into your divorce-related drama is unfair to them. Despite what you may think of your former spouse, your children likely look up to him or her as a parent. Children see their parents as infallible role models, even though no parent is perfect. By exposing your children to your grievances from the divorce, you are:

• Eroding their respect for that parent or yourself;
• Pressuring them to pick sides;

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 Posted on January 15, 2018 in Division of Assets

Getting a divorce can hurt you financially as much as it does emotionally. As part of the divorce negotiations, you will need to surrender several marital properties and other monetary assets. Afterwards, you will be left with fewer resources but many of the same financial obligations. Knowing the monetary consequences, some spouses choose to delay their divorce. By doing so, they may hope to:

• Accumulate greater financial assets to support themselves after divorce;
• Continue to take advantage of their marital status when filing taxes; or
• Repair their marriage so as to avoid divorce.

While there are some potential advantages to delaying your divorce, the disadvantages are often greater. There are several reasons why postponing a divorce hurts spouses more than it helps them:

1. Reconciliation Is Unlikely: Once you have concluded that you want to divorce, you have reached a point of virtually no return. In many cases, divorce is the correct decision, even if it is difficult to admit. You have accepted that your marriage is beyond repair, which can be the biggest obstacle to deciding to divorce.

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